The TV series on the Duggar Family has put the idea of marriage and weddings at the forefront of many people’s minds along with more focused shows such as “Say Yes to the Dress”..Aren’t individuals marrying another person, not a dress, tux or bikini for that matter? Congratulations to all who have braved with sincere hearts to be ready to care for themselves and another person and a growing family and circle of friends. Each partnership is meaningful to understand the arena of relationships in each state and country.
I am braving reviewing some sacred and civil norms in our United States of a Miracle, where women supposedly Do have a say and even a Choice in not only their wedding attire but the person each marries (and normally that’s one but again, the terms ‘same-sex marriage’ as well as TV shows such as ‘My Five Wives’ and other polygamist or open-marriage arrangements are adding to the cultural definitions of marriage.)
President Clinton spoke not long ago about dismantling the political Defense of Marriage Act which defined marriage as only between a man and a woman. That opened the way for same-gender or same-sex marriages, again between two people. Many cities in various parts of the country have a more culturally open or flexible definition of marriage as between a man and two or more wives (sometimes with the wives having separate housing or in the Jeffers case, sharing a large home compound.)
There’s not a very clear set of terms (or a menu of options) but likely there are in reality a number of ‘variations on the terms of more than two adults being involved intimately with each other at the same time’.
Points to consider include that the Centers of Disease Control reported about five years ago that about a third of monogamous couples had one or more parties not living in that context whether the other person approved or did not know or approve of such.
In England, they considered whether youth should be able to learn about any discrepancy of who their birth father was if there were a request (particularly for health reasons, but in general as a way of acknowledging that many father figures may not actaully be the biological father).
I am hoping to be very objective in this discussion of critical issues which await many youth and even current adults who are married or coupled to consider in a more practical manner to avoid difficulties or ‘unpleasant surprises’ due to denial or lack of understanding about the culture or people who may be in one’s life.
The Pope and others are considering making annulments free rather than allowing for huge financial costs and bureaucratic policies to make it very difficult for Catholic married people to divorce and be able to remarry in the Catholic Church. The Annulment would essential make their original marriage vows and thus the marriage ‘null and void’.
One person pointed out on a talk show that would essentially make the children of such an annullment akin to being born illegitimately or out-of-wedlock in their mind if not in wider circles. The pressure to conform to fundamentalist or strict doctrines of any religion or culture should be carefully considered by a civil law think-tank to help all citizens understand their rights and options under the civil laws of their country.
If a divorce or even domestic abuse interventions are needed, those laws could become their reality with ‘one episode’ or ‘one legal filing’ (for divorce or custody of the children or even primary or sole residency of the marital home).
Every state has its own criteria that pertains to the citizens living there (usually for a period of six months to a year or more as a residency requirement). In terms of getting married that can be done likely in any state and needs to have a Justice of the Peace or Minister and a local Town or City Clerk of that state do the legal paperwork about the marriage. If a person is married in another country, it does not hurt to have an American marriage ceremony performed in the US as well to help gain legal standing.
Also if one lives abroad and has a will done outside of the US that will hold up most likely even if one has a verbal or other written agreement that a person would follow the terms of an American will. The most recent Last Will will prevail. Any legal document should have two witnesses and a notarized signature (often available through a Town Clerk or at a Bank, etc). Don’t leave important matters for later, since sometimes ‘the unexpected Happens’.
In terms of Making Legal Commitments and Agreements, more searches online and with a person’s family and friends, and yes the person (or as the case may be other people) involved should plan for review of terms on a yearly or more regular basis.
The idea that a religion or other cultural factors may weigh heavily on a person’s faith and follow-through may be very important to clarify. Will there be limits in light of the laws such as in the United States about domestic abuse? There’s more to say, but I need to post before my library time is up…Add thoughts as you can and Best Wishes to do right by yourself and any in your life and family who count on you to be a team player…