DVSur5r.com and caprotectiveparents.org Great Domestic Violence and Custody Resources as is DuluthModel.org

I found a link to a Washington Post story on "Gendered Violence" about research by Joan Meier a FB page for DVSur5r.com based in NH.  Kathy Jones has an important initiative and every state could seek to emulate what she offers. Same with caprotectiveparents.org which addresses custody matters. There are many statistics based on terrible if not tragic situations that more people need to ponder, from victims to advocates, the public and legislatures. Please Make Time to Learn about these pressing matters!

There about 1000 moms done in each year and 200 children by abusive men in their lives (some biological fathers, such as is explained  with Kayden's Korner outreach in PA and is an advocacy effort a year after a young girl's passing.) These are miserable headlines and experiences people cope with often in the shadows of society. It's always hits a family and community hard to have a young person depart from this earth even from natural causes or by accident.

 Sadly we learned that with the passing of our teen son Kaelan Palmer Paton in 2009 when he tried to save friends from dangerous water. They thankfully were saved by his efforts and that of a skilled volunteer rope rescuer, Skip K. I do more outreach on livfully.org about the kinds of 'back currents' in our society that allow for victims of abuse and minors in general to be left in harm's way whether through abuse or even benign neglect or 'honest mistakes' (such as allowing teens too much freedom and not having clear safety agreements with young adults to be responsible and accountable, including not doing dangerous activities.)

 The resounding response is 'teens will be teens' and 'who can keep track of anyone once they leave the house, drive, travel etc? Didn't every generation 'do about the same', what's the difference? Today we 'all know better so we can do better.' Overall most women and children realize they could be at risk for harm (and plenty of men have faced that reality as well.) There are better models for addressing reasonable conflicts and situations in life regarding relationships, housing, finances, work and school as well as travel and caregiving and parenting skills and challenges.

 There is help online and a lot of good advice that is harder to ignore, particularly with 'consequences' such as being sued or involved with other DCF, CPS (Child Protective Services) and other systems (even local schools and sports programs with clear standards.) We can help one another by advertising resources and clear expectations for people to prevent harm rather than let things build up. Even becoming more aware of one's health and ways to be safe at home and in social situations is growing in personal realms, faith and school arenas, sports and military groups.

.An educated citizenry is like a healthy immune system. Let's keep learning even as we keep in mind the legacy of those who sadly have suffered the shortcomings of our laws, systems and social practices. We need to believe victims, show support and insist on laws that provide longterm safety such as in US House Resolution 72.

See more also on caprotectiveparents.org and thanks for doing your part. There is a FB Fundraiser Remembering Kaelan Alexander Palmer Paton's Legacy running through August 2019 to promote water safety (and by extension other forms of safety as well) and to contribute to a scholarship for a college student from the NWCT area.

There is more about Kaelan's life and final day on livfully.org (also called Remembering Kaelan Alexander Palmer Paton) and other posts. Best to all to play it smart and safe, and not take chances to rescue others if it may cost one their own life.

 Miracles may happen to have help arrive in a timely manner. One may have to tackle a friend who is prone to doing that 'unsuccessful save' that may cost them their life in the effort. We likely need to have a 'term and code' for that so that we can become more clear about our 'human limitations' particularly when dealing with forces of nature..water, fire and electricity, wind and heights and more.

We only want the best for all of the youth who were involved in going to the dangerous area 'for fun on their last day of school' (and encourage teachers, parents and adults to Look at the Landscape and Patterns over the years and in each season to determine the "No Go Zones' that would make sense. It actually means holding everyone accountable to make better Safety PLANS (with People Living with Agreements and Networking through Schools and Society) so there are not so many 'loop holes' for minors and even adults to let run rampant.
 Freedom is great but it comes with an expectation of responsibility and capability, so likely the bar needs to be raised for most youth...and adults.

(That likely would include more monitoring of anyone going to a bar, drinking, drugging and taking measures to preclude driving or having 'too much' which is really a rather low limit to stay legal...and to not hurt one's health.) Thanks for tuning into these tough topics and choosing a better way to enjoy the day... and appreciate LIFE!