NPR.org speaking about School Shooter Profiles, New book Triggered...

Sometimes I hear about what's going on in 'the real world' and sadly that may mean learning more about something that has gotten in the headlines as 'another school shooting.' Unlike when I grew up in the 1970s and even 80s, the idea of violence and school would be 'Two Things That Do Not Go Together."

After all, people are going to school mostly voluntarily, taking some optional classes and hopefully seeing friends and doing some activities they enjoy whether sports, music, theater, science, or Socializing (again maybe with a few but that's better than nothing.) Those days were Before Cell Phones and the Internet (BCPI.)

Now studies have been done and summarized in a book called Triggered (which was discussed with the author on NPR today, 5/2/22.) I was speaking with a friend who also heard that talk and she shared that her mother, who just died at age 97, actually was friends with the Latino male student who was killed at Simon's Rock in Great Barrington MA, the first such 'school shooting' (Before the term was coined and unfortunately which defined it in a way that necessarily broke the illusion and reality that schools are not safe havens through and through.

Maybe the pair of friends from the same area, but decades apart, are once again enjoying a meal together albeit with ambrosia. What are the odds we'd be hearing that talk and putting the pieces together in a timely fashion to help encourage more people to 'pay attention' not only to the warning signs of students and people who may be prone to behavioral outbursts and aggression (toward themselves and others, since some who were profiled for the book, ten of 37 that were researched, indicated they were planning for a 'murder-suicide' scenario.)

Yet many had remorse so that broke the mold of thinking that the shooters were 'earmarked to be on a destructive path as an extreme narcissist devoid of pathos and insight into human interactions and social norms.) Some said 'if a teacher or friend had intervened' they may not have stayed the course, yet others said they let friends know and wanted them to watch from a safe spot.

No students told on their 'friend' or broke the silence. Some silence Needs Breaking...and that can be the case in many less serious situations such as people heading off to a risky outing (with or without permission from adults, but not a safe game plan for rescues or avoiding dangers they are not aware of such as hidden undercurrents at the base of a waterfall. For more info on that see Remembering Kaelan Alexander Palmer Paton, whose amazing life was cut short at age 16 when seeking to save his three friends from drowning on such an 'exciting last day of school outing' that some adults approved of and others did not know about who were the parents.

Some parents felt that was the parents 'fault' for not knowing what their kids were up to...and some agencies nowadays might even take the other siblings from such parents as a precaution if it seems the parents do not have good judgment or there is high conflict in a custody battle or other 'reasons' (that they may or may not disclose before or after putting kids with other family or in foster care for up to two years.) Those are other 'related important issues' ALL Parents and Kids would be wise to learn about in their own state.

Some places such as Nevada will put someone in jail for Writing a Bad Check, even for failing to pay a little child support (even a protective mother seeking custody or safety.) The new laws for CT include Jennifers' Laws and Kayden's Law to protect victims of domestic abuse. I would ask how many school shooters (or similar dangerous people) have a history of Domestic  Violence as a child or perpetrator in their own relationships as a bully, intimate partner or other role even of authority such as a teacher, leader, minister or coach or military or police personnel?

If more people learned the basics of situational awareness and 'psychological and practical profiling for one's safety and sanity' with supportive people who are trained (and plenty of online help and resources in a local community) it's as though time could be Slowed Down and Smarter Moves (maybe even relocating for part of one's day, week or living situation through programs, trips, short stays with others and support online and on the phone if not in person.)It takes years to think and act in certain ways and yet with more guidance many small changes or bigger ones can be explored.

If there are direct interactions with programs and people 'in charge' someone may face more serious consequences for something others readily dismissed (such as students who did not inform anyone about a dangerour person's plans were apt to do. If there were a penalty for being complicit or encouragement to have apologies of action to do community service or pay a fee, more students and families may want to opt toward being pro-active and informed. ) 

These are difficult topics and not too common, yet there are many impacts a family and social circle as well as wider community suffers and had to process for years even after 'accidents' whether among risk-takers (driving fast, being in whitewater or near dangerous places and much more that fill the headlines.) Let's aim to keep the wisdom high and the injury or other set-backs or fatalities low or nil. See what the Carey Gabay Foundation is doing in NYC too!

Thanks to all working in their spheres of influence to make life more comprehensible and responsive to valid needs and even the wild-card ripple effects that many people have in their 'backpacks' of life experiences and with what they are hoping to manage or achieve.

A lot of the mindfulness and calming practices encourage people early and often (in life and everyday) to learn to Breath In and to Breathe Out (slowly and fully...) a few times. The thoughts we have can arise from the feelings we are having...and those can get going in a loop and spin into action if not aware that the body goes where thought flows.

See a free offer on this site a few months ago on using Braintime for a month to help balance the right and left brain. Be in touch if you'd like to talk more about these topics and that program to be an affiliate under me too. Hopefully each state (schools, prisons, faith groups and more such as the military and athletes) could use the programs widely and regularly to help everyone's brain function with peace and empathy 'built in'. Have a special easy-does-it day...See more on my public FB page, Catherine Palmer Paton of CT.