NYC Marathon 2017...Tremendous Kudos...but also time to think about Texas Losses that same day, 11-5-17

While I can be shy sometimes..well, maybe just busy and not finding a way to post something important or timely on my blog, Sometimes, Life Beckons..and I have to Make The Time.

While I wish I could say I was mainly eager to share the enthusiasm for the NYC Marathon and find ways to help US All really tune into the amazing people running or otherwise covering the 26 miles (such as those professional wheelchair folks who were mainly peddling with their arms, including a much older woman), I have to focus first on the sad news of the 26 members of the church who died..and the unbalanced person who happened to be male who basically was dead spiritually before his mortal life ended.

Accepting that the human conditions comes with 'no guarantees' and reminds us that whether we are nurtured, brain washed, or otherwise influenced by events or our environment, there's no way to know 100% What exactly would lead someone to commit such crimes, whether ending the life of many or one other, or even their own...if it seems for 'all the wrong reasons'.

Strangely I was hearing from someone who worked in a prison as a volunteer that many decades ago, a man killed a man, and only shared with others after decades that was his crime and why he did it. He found the man assaulting his own young relative. Nowadays there likely would not be such a heavy punishment, but some states that had such penalties do not reverse them in modern times.

The whole prison system needs serious review and consideration from many more aspects of society. More help for those who are struggling with identifiable conditions of mental or physical health challenges as well as social deficiencies and low income related problems (lack of food, housing, transportation and more.) New York may be unique in having Article 17 in its State Constitution that asserts the state has an obligation to help citizens be able to live in the state. Does Texas have such a standard?

The balance of powers between police, laws and citizen's rights is another important discussion that needs to happen likely online where people can keep track of 'what's what.' Civil and Criminal Courts are separate but a fine line is all that divides some matters. IF a person files a police report, then the police may have procedures to investigate whether a person was told that was the case or even if they were told that would not be the case.

People hoping to have help for civil or family matters from the police need to find out more clearly what would count as a reason for the police to intervene. Maybe anonymous 'ask and review matters' site could be established and coached by 'people in the know' whether actual police officers or savvy trained citizens, paid or volunteer workers.

I have to read more about what has been learned about the Texas church tragedy..and even the father ending his young biological son's life likely for being gay. One headline said it seemed clear the father wanted a 'dead son' more than a gay one...I would offer that on the one hand, thinking of killing one's child basically makes the title of parent 'null and void'.

By Definition and as understood by basic laws, the role of a parent is to provide and care for one's offspring. The idea that the youth was trapped in a household with such an abuser and his killer is very tragic.(Same goes for a boyfriend killing his 'girlfriend' or a husband killing his 'wife'..The terms can confuse everyone and likely even the person doing the killing. They feel Too Entitled with that title and are over-identifying with their role in someone else's life. It's kind of the way our culture trains people to be and does not get people to Check themselves out with a free website. The Lundy Bancroft www.shouldIstayorshouldIgo.net is a good place, but overall Relationships that involve caring for another person or sharing space or other responsibilities--even rearing children separately--Require certain skill sets and levels of maturity and capability. If someone Doesn't have what it takes, they may be taking for others to make up for their deficiencies and Not even Know It...that's just another one of their Deficiencies. So no need to put the 'honorary title' of 'spouse or partner' on someone who is clearly making that null and void with threats, actions or injury or worse. No need for the Media to keep the cycle of Confusion and Lack of Clarity going by pinpointing what triggered the perpetrator to do his killing..he made a choice, either planned or with little notice to Control another person.

Yet even that is short-sighted since once someone is killed, they cannot be controlled. One out of three times if a person, generally a man, ends someone's life in a domestic relationship, he ends his own life. With that he also no longer has Control over his Own life..It's 'Game Over'. So not getting the long-term satisfaction is one way the short-sighted person is thinking is reasonable.

Likely he's " thinking" he's solving something once and for all, and forever. To a mortal who does not believe in the afterlife, that may seem logical but as more people Consider the Spirit Goes On after death, the killer likely can surmise that he actually is Not Controlling The person's spirit after the body is deceased. Sorry to go to the difficult topics, but that's part of what I try to do since it does take time to think things through and it doesn't seem to be anyone's Job to do so, even when there's such a Loss of life under strange and sudden circumstances.

There is a great need to review many matters about religious teachings (the history that Alice Miller covers in For Your Own Good and other books about 'beating the devil out of one's children' for instance) to help those who have gone to church and who are still going to 'stop and smell the roses' and get up to code on what is Legal and Reasonable for the times in which we live.

It is very challenging for most devout Anything, Christian, or otherwise, to think carefully about the Historical Legacies of the the teachings and practices of any faith..and to consider that there could be a lot going on illegally and immorally behind the scenes. I have found it an ongoing challenge for decades..and yet all of this speaks to the current pressing challenges of what we are all facing as the current generations on the planet.

We likely need to learn a lot of Other Stuff that is Not in the media...I was listening to Linda Moulton Howe about Neil Armstrong and others landing on the moon and 'seeing a few aliens there'. The whole topic of UFOs, aliens (friendlies and otherwise), advanced technologies and civilizations is taboo and shunned, mocked and otherwise silenced.

Meanwhile the fear and craziness around random acts of violence is drilled into our collective story to the point one can hardly get a word in edgewise. In terms of honoring the lives of those lost in the church setting, we can hold them with Great Love and In the Light of Peace, Calm, Healing, and yes, even Forgiveness...I count children and caregivers sometimes off by the alphabet and when I go from A to Z I say 'we have at least 26 in the room'.

Now that comes to mind to say those 26 can represent the alphabet of our diversity and many names, cultures, our United States (26 x 2 is 52, so that's the 50 states and its territories with the '2' standing in for more than that number...) 26 weeks would be half a year, maybe in addition to keeping them in our hearts for three days as many say can help their spirits transition, we could have learn more about each one and remember them week by week.

These kinds of situations have a lot of support, whereas more singular acts of violence often are lost in the crowd. However each state could provide a place for people to find more ways to process challenges, find support (such as End of Life Doulas) and prepare themselves and family and friends to work together to find a 'new normal' over weeks, months and even years, the better our society could really address matters more compassionately. With that I will bid everyone a peaceful night. Those who have crossed over are more at peace than we can generally find ways to comprehend.

But having faith can help one journey toward a sense of 'believing in things not seen'. Let's promote a greater sense of love for ourselves, one another, our world and the Divine.. without getting caught up in semantics and politics...or even specific religious doctrines..Let's feel the love and peace in our hearts and minds, our days and nights of rest and work together with growing awareness that we are more delicate and amazing than anyone generally allows us a way or time to appreciate. Hugs All Around, Catherine aka Livfully