Keys to Caring for Ourselves from Head to Toe and Personal Space Plus

While there are 'ten thousand things' in the universe to be aware of, we each come packaged in one bodily unit (for the most part and kudos to those conjoined twins who keep us all aware of the possibilities in life and the idea of sticking with someone 'through thick and thin.' As I recall the pair of brothers who were called the Siamese Twins led full lives, each having a family even.

Sadly back in their time they didn't realize a relatively simple surgery would have allowed them to be disconnected.When one died, the other waited it out until he perished. Maybe they didn't have the technology to do the procedure and control bleeding, etc. That set of challenges and events could give us much more to think about and allow people more insight into 'what is reasonable' and what might be asking too much, especially without a team of support.

That goes for many relationships and caregiving situations. As sad as it is to have to 'be monitored', many people in work settings are held to that standard 'for good reason' and to prevent further harm. To get ahead of that learning curve, it makes sense to consider 'What IF I were being monitored? How Might I or Others near me assure no laws or practical guidelines are broken (especially repeatedly and without getting support to change or maintain a new approach.)

What ticks one person off doesn't even phase another. Ambulance drivers train to 'block out cries and screams' whether of babies or people who are injured so they can focus on driving, one person shared with me a while back. That would be helpful for new parents and others to consider...they have a Choice about how they respond to the cries of a young infant or older child. Rather than be annoyed or even distressed by the loud siren-like sound of cries or yelling (such as during a tantrum of a person of any age), a person can literally cover their ears (with their fingers, but ideally if it is safe, walk into another room and turn music on or make a call.

That is if a person is feeling 'it's too much to hear' and there is no obvious medical need. Keep in mind infants, abdominal gas or constipation can cause great distress. There could be concerns with the intestines not functioning properly, so cries of serious distress should be heeded with a call to 9-1-1 if there isn't a way to get other medical input from a doctor or a ride to a medical clinic from a friend or taxi. Even then, in case things 'get worse, it makes sense to have an ambulance, particularly if one is having signs of heart failure or breathing distress (and are not in the end phase of life when one may want to die of natural causes.)

There may be ways to ease the breathing crisis if one has a hospice team who can prepare people for such an episode to ease pain and suffering. That all takes more training and practice than most ever take time to do even when they know that's a possibility. Ideally we would have a website available to people nationally and worldwide regarding "What To Do In A Crisis" (other than Cry, "Sis!" but that might be a good start especially if your sisters and friends have some basic medical training.) They can sometimes build your confidence to make a call to your doctor or look online for more information or call 9-1-1 on a cell phone or landline, or have a friend do so. 

In terms of protecting one's personal space from someone playing a joke on one that may be too startling or physically upsetting (like a sudden tickle under the arms or splashing water on someone who is not expecting that (for fun, not hot water or strong water, etc) or any number of pranks and jokes, try to let people know early and often, you don't like that.

Even people walking into a room quietly and not announcing themselves with a cough or a hello well before they are in your personal space can be alarming (whether in a large home, or small apartment, and any time of day or night not having a surprise of another person showing up 'out of nowhere' is important. ) Locked doors or at least something in front of a door that can move and give someone some notice, bells on the door or other signs that say "Please Knock and Wait  for a response before entering' would make sense if there are rooms 'with no locks'. 

Of course for bathrooms that makes good sense. Eventually it'd be nice to have some music one could play while in public bathrooms (maybe on one's cell phone) to add some ambience and help people feel they are not feeling 'on the spot'. Doesn't hurt to have one's own extra tissues and even a couple of larger yogurt containers in case 'there is not toilet working' (that happens on a train or maybe even a bus with bathrooms on occasion.) Ideally there could be a number of 'privacy booths' throughout cities where people could have a few minutes to themselves in case there are no bathrooms handy.

Those likely would need a monitor outdoors and perhaps a way to have 'recyclable buckets' that could be picked up and taken away to be disposed of by an approved van, etc. Eventually more people could appreciate that as living beings, our 'outputs' have an environmental impact and could actually be used to help restore the earth's depleted soil when treated appropriately. There could be big business and likely someone's been keeping the lid on that little treasure trove of resources for quite some time. Even at our collective peril.

Okay, so the basic idea I had in starting this post was to get people thinking about the ways each part of the body from head to toe could be best cared for by oneself and others promoting health and wellness. In doing so, fewer illnessed, injuries or crimes or harm would come to pass and save us That Much More in health care and 'clean-up and crime' costs in our society. This is a multi-billion dollar idea and could take a few more pages to explore. But at least I'm getting the ball rolling (at the midpoint of my life so sometimes it takes a while to put words on paper even after considering such ideas with others on and off for years.) 

There is a post on this livfully.org blog about Counting to 10 in a Whole New Way from Head to Toe (or something like that) wherein I name all of the major body parts, outside and in, and with Left, Right and Center and male and female indicated. I use a simple code for each side and part, and have Right as A and Left as B and Center as C. (Most people are right-handed and so this refers to one's right side. If looking at a drawing of person facing you, Their Right Side would be A (which would look like the left side facing you) and Their Left Side would be B (which would be the right side facing you) and Their Center would still be the center facing you.

Then the counting would go from One for the Head down to Ten for the Feet, with the basics described on that other post. After that  the side and then the first two letters of the body part would be named. So one's right eye would be 1AEy. The left eye would be 1BEy. The neck would be 2C, the right shoulder woulbe be 3ASh (and the arms are also 3AAr, and 3BAr as ar the hands, 3AHa and 3BHa). Then there are sections 4 for upper body, heart and lungs,5 for the upper abdomen, 6 for the lower abdomen and genitals, then 7 for the hips and thighs, 8 for the knees, 9 for the lower leg and 10 for the feet.

I have spelled out how each part of the body may be linked to a certain laws (or commit certain crimes.) That way people would not need to use graphic language in conveying what happened (especially repeatedly.) Some of these would be helpful in terms of not having to say 'shot in the chest or head' or 'beheaded' whether due to a car accident or a crime or penalty. The loss of hands and vision would also have codes. The reasons for using such terms is not to minimize what happened but to help prevent more of that kind of harm in terms of not 'advertising such' to people who may be more prone to adopt such behaviors or feel more drawn into that realm.

Even suicide can have a code, and again ways to describe any kind of death in reference to the code for the body parts that expired or were damaged. There could be more ways to work with the data of such seemingly disparate situations or crimes. The victims and their families of injuries or those who are no longer on the earth could be respected and not reminded of crimes and harm. Those who are no longer mortally present could be referred to with a code, as can people of each gender and age.

I have a set of codes for that too. Now I could use some help taking that to the next level. I could write to some colleges and businesses. This blog is set up to spur the use of the information I share in ways that benefit others. If a profit is made I am to receive reasonable compensation...so I was told and have to explore further. I figure we really are 'all on the clock' with climate change and even local concerns, so the more businesses, educational, faith and civic people who can collaborate the better...and none too soon.

I will wrap this up now before I garden a bit more. I should have covered the ground to keep the grass from coming up. I had a plan to move most of my perennials (not the asparagus which grows very deep roots) to a new bed I made last year thanks to some handy helpers and a free delivery of top soil I ordered since I heard someone else did so from McEnroe's in Millerton NY.

They are having some nice events and all of the garden centers could be a great field trip for anyone with family or friends. Ward's in Great Barrington MA, Paley's in Sharon CT and Salisbury Garden Center in Salisbury (makes sense, right?) CT (which is a few doors down the hill from where I my first home was for four years so is always a special 'high five' place for me to drive by or the Garden Center to go visit. I recall getting a real glass bottle of soda from the liquor store that was there for eons when I was young or maybe when I went back over the years. The Salisbury School is right up the road and I know folks who attended back when I was in college, as well as people who have worked their for decades.

Other great local private schools include Lakeville's Hotchkiss, and Indian Mountain (which also had a younger program called Town Hill where I taught physical education for a year and subbed for a bit right out of Vassar College in Poughkeepsie NY.) There's also Kent School and Berkshire School a half hour in either direction. All of these places have basically very rich learning histories.

Sadly some have been plagued by troubled faculty and others who it has been documented had crimes happening over many years 'right under their noses.' I am sure many extend their heartfelt apologies for having such transgressions and crimes unfold in this area. Yet there is more evidence that likely in every town, whether through a public, private, educational, business, faith or personal venue, many children and women and even men have suffered assaults of coercive control limiting their ability to exercise their basic human freedoms and 'self-agency', their educational or other skills and talents, their social and even family ties and personal and professional development on many levels over decades.

That kind of healing needs special care and support to mend as communites, towns, regions, states and countries. It is basically a worldwide travesty highly curtailing the abilities of almost all women and far too many children and yes, even many men. Maybe with that thorough understanding that this is shared tragic aspect of the past, everyone can find time to consider ways to heal, not seek revenge. If compensation can be made through personal or class action suits those are further wake up calls and ways to endorse the healing path. As for the offenders, likely more could be done online to offer a variety of questions and considerations for them to explore what parts of them were getting the best of them and leading them away from a higher nature of respecting others and themselves.

If someone has not heard the word of respect over many years and seen evidence of 'how that can be a realistic way to live and to benefit others in their community' then that may be the place to start. There are those who seem to have 'gotten away with crimes against family, friends, strangers, youth, elderly or others who have not been able or willing to disclose to someone even to find some inner peace (not necessarily seek a conviction or disclose publicly.) A greater understanding of how 'old deeds can come to light' and how the media can factor into relaying a story far and wide beyond what newspapers or other court reports may have done in the past may be helping curtail ongoing abuse. Yet even there, many are 'pushing their agenda' and may be stuck in some kind of serious personality disorder or other dysfunctional patterns.

Finding ways to get to 'a fresh start' in one's own mind when faced with any kind of difficulty could be made easier with websites that 'show people the way' from being stuck through options to relocate, distance themselves from people they may be prone to harm or have harmed, find support through youtube videos and other resources addressing the possible spiritual, social and even physical and cultural underpinnings of a downward spiral of thinking and actions.

Much on this blog explores ways to look at the human experience with insights from various schools of thought such as Edgar Cayce, Rudolf Steiner, Catholic and Christian teaching, basics from many traditions as well as ways to focus on healing and preventing harm to oneself and others. 

Hopefully more people can join in a conversation that officially has not been happening for decades..and for various reasons will likely remain 'in the closet and closed court rooms.' I did notice an episode of Blue Bloods will air on Saturday, May 11th at 9am (EST) which I get on Channel 12 in CT that will address college sexual assault as far as I recall from an ad for it. When people have a common reference such as the #MeToo movement then strides can be made in more fields.

Seeing  online what the Battered Mothers Custody Conference has been offering for 14 years is helpful as is the CA Protective Parents Association, both of which have many resources worth pursuing. All the best to keeping every body part and everybody safe and sound to use for good works and to stay in good health, one and all. Best to everybuddy, Kindly, Catherine @ livfully.org