Helping the Homeless, those in Transitions, Wrongfully Put in Prison and Preventing Abuse (all in one post for your advocacy convenience for self and others..)

I've met many a homeless in the NYC area and a few in Great Barrington MA and the MA/NY CT try-corner area and hope others are keeping an eye on 
any homeless (or houseless, even though one may or does own a house... but just doesn't or can't live in it.)

Maybe a few more folks offering help such as a van he could sit in or put his stuff in and transport from one end of town to the other from time to time would be welcome..just one or two nice folks helping him and maybe a few others could help turn the tide of his situation where there have been bumps in the road.

There are news articles about David Magadini in Grt Barrington MA. Meanwhile, why not have more 'vans to those in need due to housing or other factors' that could serve as mobile outreach units, providing social services (a laptop, mobile phones that stay with the van and have folks who can make calls and do research, write and mail letters or forms and so on).

In the city, they could travel from block to block in a timely fashion, say every half hour or less, depending on whether there are people there and be on a schedule so more people could access them. I've met very nice people without permanent housing.

They have to go to shelters which don't always have beds available. What about some outdoor or camping in cabin type homeless shelters? I've heard some are put up in hotels to serve overflow. I've also met a woman who was begging for her daily hotel fee of 65 a night (sharing with one other/).

The program www.thrivenyc.org will have $850 million to help with mental illness and drug recovery efforts...so maybe some of that will go to practical needs to assist people too. I do know a very worthy woman, Elsa Newman (see Justice 4(for) Elsa Newman) to learn of her difficult story after trying to protect her children from abuse.

She landed in jail after a friend took matters into her own hands without Elsa knowing. Still Elsa was charged with conspiracy to harm (or kill) her former husband. She was put in jail for two different terms and is recently out finally.

She needs to stay in the NYC area for work and probation terms though can maybe go back to Maryland. I would like to find folks to help set up a Go Fund Me Account and give her more support.

A former appellate judge, Elsa is a remarkably knowledgeable woman who served over 10 years in prison for a crime she did not commit. Her former husband got custody of her two sons who she is estranged from at this time.

There's always hope, but see www.courageouskids.net to learn how difficult it can be for kids to process being away from their primary protective parent...not easy. The info of the Saunders study on www.barrygoldstein.netis also disturbing, showing adverse childhood experiences (ACES) can have lifelong effects on health and relationships.

Worth forming our own groups to advise parents how to avoid these situations if possible. Carefully thinking of legal marriage as only after a few years (even 5-10) of working clearly together in a business type relationship, spelling out terms for sharing expenses, money, debt, new costs, housing, childcare (and ideally waiting five years to have one's first child if under 21 and at least 3 years if 22 or even 25 etc. Getting to know how a person really acts, feels, socializes, works and so on can take a couple of years.

Actually spending time together doing shared activities (not just occupying the same dwelling or visiting each other) can take months and even a couple of years to figure out and practice to see if that is what really resonates with one's life goals, visions and beliefs.

Spelling things out in writing (likely there are many such contracts online for relationships) could be very helpful. Include what you Do Want along with what would be Deal Breakers or things you Do Not Want to have happen.

With socializing with others, that may mean visits out of one's home, but not out of town for the day. Ideally each would be clearly aware of who the other spends time with regularly and even occasionally, particularly if there are any romantic overtones (crushes, high emotional needs after loss or during conflict, etc).

Some faith groups promote the idea of people visiting in at least a group of three rather than pairs (and that would be three adults), particularly if people are of the opposite gender.

These guidelines again could be found on a site such as www.jw.org likely or any Mormon church or many Christian groups for safe churches and basic school safety or Scouting safety.

Extend the rules for caregiving for youth to include adults one is interacting with, Checking in with them in some way if they are aware they have choices about how much time they spend talking with another on the phone, in person, at events, and so on.

They see if they are clear there are choices about saying yes or no or only with a friend to visit with a third party, go for a drive, spend a day away or even have guests in their home or another person's. Situational Awareness (SA) is a term many professionals use to remind people to know not only where the exits are in a room or building but to avoid difficulty, conflict with others and to be aware of each person's intentions or patterns.

Too often someone driving or hosting something in their home feel they are 'in charge' and can act in a controlling manner, possibly take advantage of others by driving erratically or insisting on going their own way or handling a situation on their terms.

Too often some men or adults, parents and yes, even women can feel entitled to pressure a woman (primarily but again some a man too or younger person or more vulnerable) to be more involved with them than she really wants and won't take 'no' or 'not now' for an answer.

Having one's own space in a home or even as a guest can be helpful (with a lock on the door even), but likely if that is needed, then things aren't secure. Before going onto someone else's turf, realize the power difference of a homeowner versus a guest.

Both parties can take time to review that modern laws in many states may prioritize people's safety, so it does not matter if a person is a homeowner or landlord if they are intimidating others or being belligerent with throwing things, yelling or assaulting someone physically with pushes, holds, hits and so on.

If people live together as housemates or family or if people are in a relationship (or are biological parents, or even teens dating, etc), there can be grounds for domestic abuse laws to come into play.

Many people have Never Heard of Them. That must not be the case.Most people over 40 or 50 have not really heard about things like this because The Laws were only made 30 years ago or so.

They are often not really applied in many states, are not consistent and completely change if there is a custody or divorce situation.

That's when safety should be Prioritized, but unfortunately due to the different approaches of Civil vs Criminal Court, common sense,safety and even basic protection of victims goes out the window in a divorce or custody situation.

Some experts say one may get more intervention by going to criminal court for concerns even during a divorce (or ideally before). Still mention of ending a relationship or changing terms can be a difficult if not dangerous time for many women and children. Some men may have a different serious kind of challenge also.

These are things everyone Needs to Know Well in Advance and All Along the time one is in a relationship or co-housing or parenting relationship whether together or apart.

More ideas on livfully blog (Which Will be at a new hosting site soon due to drupalgardens shutting down that service).Thanks and see you on the web and safely about town to the best of our collective abilities...