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Crafting Great Safety PLANS with Our Community Thinking KAPP (Kids, Adults, Parents Partnership)

on Sun, 06/09/2013 - 11:39

Why not think of 'who's in the game" and what role each person plays both in making choices and using their voices to promote safety and respect for people at all ages and stages of life?

A Big Question merits a Big Answer, yet some of the people most affected by our collective laws and choices are very small, voiceless or otherwise not protected in meaningful ways...Does anyone ever ASK a 'child' ( a person of a younger biological age not necessarily someone less intelligent, sober or wise, mentally balanced or practical) what he/she/they think of some parts of their lives whether in regard to how someone is supervisiing them, meeting their basic needs, monitoring their actiivities, coaching them about key aspects of laws they need to follow or at least know about?

That would mainly be 'No, no one is asking or interested or even AWARE that kids are people too when it comes to making decisions. A huge aspect of our culture would be public school, daycare or other youth facilities.. Youth are not asked or expected to 'give their consent' to attending such programs. I spoke with some happy-enough 2nd graders a few years ago who said they wished they could have some more free time to talk and do what they wanted.

Why was it they just had to continually do a lot of work and not get enough breaks? Some students don't have recess, while some states are protecting that 'free play and talk time', not necessarily outdoors but maybe that is being regulated as well.

Once we Consider the reality 'Kids of each age' face, then we can realize they are children of Parents. Who ever heard of asking PARENTS what they thought of the programs offered to their children? Is that done now and then or in more formal ways? Are there opportunities for parents to meet ALL the children in their child's class, group of classes, on the team of a sports program or in their school?

Are there informal networks to help mothers and other female caregivers connect? How about for fathers and other male caregivers to connect about their children's development and their shared understanding of 'watching the kids or taking them on outings'? Where do other adults and  community groups get to chime in on these 'informal and often non-existent" community conversations?

When people are in 'custody discussions' or determining paternity many serious discussions about the care and expectations occur as they likely do in some in vitro maternity determinations may also need validating... as well as discussion about the custody and future of in vitro embryos that are still frozen, or surrogate parent rights, etc).

Unless parents are clear about what their righst and response-abilities are both individually and as successive roles may evolve (part-time or shared or sole parenting, step-parenting, caring for other people's youth, etc) then each person 'makes it up as they go along'. Sometimes that's falling short of the mark that we could have to assure all parents and adults a more secure level of 'agreements'.

The idea of people of every age and stage of life living in meaningful, accountable ways when it comes to caring for others ,and ideally even for themselves, needs Clarification and Networking with local,national and legal parameters. All aspects of our countries, states, geographic regions, cities and towns, schools, civic, faith, neighborhood and family groupings. Everyone exists as more than a lone individual. Each is born to two biological parents even if they are not known or living.

That's a 'common starting point'. Everyone has an age, which can be useful to reflect on in terms of being part of a certain generation and year, to network and care about each other. Then there are the basic genders of male, female and now the more widely-understood transgender or mixed gender or androgynous (not identifying oneself as either male or female psychologically). However one defines themself psychologically is generally the way their gender will be recognized in society when given due respect.

Their physiology does not have to match their preferred or chosen gender. At any age or stage of life, a person likely needs some care from others and gives as well either to their caregivers or to others in their network. Our needs and offerings may change over time, but many preferences can be acknowledged.

 When we live with our Community Thinking KAPP (Kids, Adults, Parents Partnership) PLANS (People Living and Learning with Agreements and Networking through Schools and Society) we can feel like part of caring team of thinkers and capable people. All people play meaningful roles in our communities. 
All people are provided certain basic human rights, in theory.

To assure quality care we need accountability from the caregivers and feedback from the ones they care for. Even for oneself, a basic standard of 'self-care' could be promoted to help everyone for ask for help as needed and to be aware of resource people and programs to get basic needs met regularly and efficiently. There could be more public education to everyone, all of the public, in terms of websites for each state and programs such as offered by www.211.org. The fine-tuning to assure that all people are receiving help with support to fill out forms, stay current with requirements, get to appointments or programs is a larger team effort.

Likely people who are willing to help voluntarily could provide a greater outreach to those with more pronounced needs. These high-need groups may include new parents, families with young children or even in the first few years of grade school or homeschool, anyone with physical or mental health needs, aging issues or transportation or other key concerns. Everyone deserves a CAR (Citizen Activist Resources) to help them get to where they want to be going.

Maybe people need help with obtaining options for transportation--rides to work or school or other events, a driver if one has a car to maintain independence or go places one may not feel able to drive to in various kinds of weather or in the dark or in not sober, or under stress such as during a divorce, going to court, when someone is ill or when extra help is needed. Perhaps people need small short-term loans or could barter to get needs met. Joining a group as a volunteer or spectator could help bridge gaps if someone has been socially isolated or has a change in work or life which shifts their social circumstances.

There are many 'unmet needs' that more voluntary networks could address. The more people know in terms of accessing resources and helping build a responsive community, the fewer people will fall between the cracks of 'not knowing who, what or how to get things done'. Thanks for thinking on this and consider sharing with others to help transform our world. Good ideas to post about town are on www.duluthmodel.org as well as on www.gaia.org.

Cheaper ways to obtain ideas about re-greening our plan-it earth (or heart) and promoting 'earth care, people care and resource share' are sites about Permaculture (PC) such as www.thePINE.org.  Also see the Check List for Chicks and Guys on this blog. Feel free to share ideas here.

All these little ideas add up to help us Lend a Hand while still on Land. We can reach out a hand while still on land to promote safety and respect, to stay out of dAnger of all kinds, to dare to care and share to help ourselves and others..." Let US-All keep a good thing growing and look at the world with new eyes that see more than we could before in terms of hope and options (such as on www.option.org and www.firethegrid.com and Thrive Movement online). We can reflect also on our collective heroism and life cycle.

The memorial service on youtube of Kaelan Paton offers a unique way to reflect on the difficulty of accepting the sudden loss of  a loved one. Kaelan died trying to save a friend, who thankfully was saved by rescuer Skip Kosciusko (who speaks midway through the video segments of the service.) Overall, a greater sense of networking among professionals and people to care for people of all ages is a special way to remember all of our loved ones who have crossed over to the other side and to honor the time we have here together as local and world citizens.

Let US-All aim to make the world a friendlier place for those here and those yet to come, particularly as the global climate warming will make the cost of living higher and the ways to meet people's basic needs more challenging. Thanks for being a key part of the 'soul-you-tion' to any problem that comes your way. Remember, you are Not Alone, but rather we are 'all one' and it's Good to ASK for help early on and often when needed, even for longterm problems! Let's keep the faith and spread the words of hope to help put down the swords of despair or violence.

Comments

A Letter to the Editor to www.tricornernews.com (The Lakeville Journal) is one of many I have written since our teen son Kaelan Paton 'went through the open door' in the HoUSAtonic River in Falls Village CT, my hometown, a place I thought would be an extra protective way to rear all four children whose many relatives had gone to Housatonic Valley Reginal High School, located about a mile from the Great Falls, which unfortunately factored directly into Kaelan's demise.

There is a lot on google about Kaelan's passing and I would hope every school community and set of town leaders and adults could take time to review the notions I share in the most recent (or many prior lettes which eventually I could try to post here with a techies help).

While I had many reservations about using a computer for about ten years, once I learned e-mail I realized it was a major way to stay connected, particularly in a rural area where I had not even had TV for decades.

That's too isolating. When our son died, not only was his photo being shown on TV as part of a recovery effort, I heard that people were talking about it on Facebook. It took me about a month to find a way to view comments on that link and more recently on Northeast Paddlers and Folk-Legacy Records (and their Mudcat link for folk musicians and singers, a nice underground network that holds festivals and promotes all good things folkie).

Basically, I've been learning many Theories about the Afterlife, but also many practical ways we Should be Planning for safety. I'll share more when I have time. I'd written extensively about some parts of the day Kaelan passed away, and would like to do a book (and am open to help on this as well as input from friends he had from school and various circles).

Thanks again for viewing and sharing this or his memorial on youtube to promote learning and keeping his memory, heroism and spirit alive in meaningful ways.

This is the kind of tonic we all need, for good care for one and US-All as we live fully and gratefully for the gifts of life and the Big Love which undergirds humanity and our universe (from the theories from spiritual science on youtube and info from Birth Angels from www.heavenandearthworks.com .

Hello, I wrote many things about Kaelan's passing to mark the 4th year since his sudden exit. I go into modes where there seem like endless connections, and I feel that is the case. To catch handfuls and put them into words  with a varied audience is challenging yet I'm grateful some will lend me an ear and morevoer their hEart..

Not everything I took time to type out one late night posted..I may find it but  if not, at least I had time then to reconsider the lessons and implications of Kaelan's wondrous life and his difficult exit, which included some challenging times many a youth or young adult may face...the break-up of his biological parents who (lengthy and costly which is NOT necessary..please see the last book I offered to Kaelan as a remedy for his generation, called Divorce Without Court from www.nolo.com. The divorce settled with his mom giving in to terms she was not okay with and to a divorce she never wanted yet had to agree to (that's no-fault terms but again no one should have to stay legally married or live with someone even if never married, but there are Big Responsibilities to be Fair and Decent especially when Children are in the mix--we have a broken court system which I cover in other posts so all can be clear about that important Detail!

Even if not the most idyllic ,after a few years of dating,  the marital status lasted 20 years (2/13/1988-6/15/09, the day before Kaelan died and marking about 2 years or more of Kaelan's mom not being able to  see him logistically due to a strange conflict, another Huge Detail more can learn from to Avoid--don't just allow others to keep one's kids from a  safe parent!).

In general, it's very important for all  people of every age and stage of life (even to currently check your awareness and relationships at home, at work, school, ect) to study forms of control, intimidation, abuse and name it as such rather than pretend otherwise...same with drug and mental health issues.

All family members are impacted by someone's dysfunction, abuse or malady..for life, so each deserves education and support to get safe and heal longterm...

We had not only 4 amazing kids come along, but others in spirit via 5 miscarriages and for the record a huge extended family and many caring friends.

These 'details' may seem 'too personal' but if it's one thing I've  felt about our teen son's passing is 'to drop the secrets and get real while one's alive'. I've learned a lot about the Possibility of Karma and it's not an easy nugget to swallow...'what one sows so shall one reap'.

I pray for everybuddy (close and in communities and varous countries even) to think about being an honest, caring, human team player...and to seek forgiveness and give it as 'a modus operandi'.

IF someone is mentally unstable, yelling and accusing others of things with no reason for doing so...can't we have some compassion and seek to HELP Them get help (and not allow them to hurt others verbally or with threats and so on?) Too many feel this is all 'a private matter. Well, the TANSH saga (the Tragedy and Transition at Newtown, Sandy Hook as well as Boston or CO) should cure US-All of the 'It can't happen to me or US even though we're part of US-All maybe in more ways than geographically..maybe our actions do impact others in ways we don't realize, maybe we are balancing out lifetimes (or even this life's) negative or  specific 'requests' which may look like wishes, commands or other ways of naming and claiming something with passion (good, bad or otherwise).

We would all do well to Consider the Possibilities of many new age or spiritual science (on youtuve, Nassim Haramein for instance) ideas that 'we are all part of one connected energy field' and we really need to go easy on each other so we don't make damaging waves Which Can (and likely Will) Come back to wash over US-All in proportion to what we dished out...

Okay, need to go now, check out The Dome series and think about celebrating the 95th birthday of www.leonardweber.net  Check it out and order a print today to celebrate with him!

I'm excited to have written plenty to help people think about little things and agreements to clarify how we live with our Community Thinking KAPP (Kids, Adults, Parents Partnerships) with PLANS (People Living and Learning with Agreements and Networking through Schools and Society).  See the more recent post on this site, and chime in with your own tips. Thanks for helping to spread the words to put down the swords towards ourselves and others. Be a friend to yourself and others, hug a tree, appreciate a bird in flight,  a horse standing upright,  a person who remembers they can (and should by cool) and walk AWAY from a fight!

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