Find Your Own Way to Celebrate May 5th (I'll tell you why for starters..)

 So half awake I was recalling that May 5th is 'Buddha's Birthday". I read about him being born in the sign of Taurus in a book I happened to be thumbing through which I had gotten for free in a giveaway pile of  books.

The idea of recycing books may actually be one nice way to celebrate May 5th, which of course is also Cinco de Mayo. Plus if you've seen a few prior posts, I have named that day "55 Year Old Day" so all people who are 55 can give themselves and others (the same or different ages...High 5s, maybe two at once to echo the 5-5. Turning an age into a date  such as 55 into 5-5 or May 5th will likely Transform your whole sense of the year.

That  in turn can remind you to celebrate being alive every day... since each is truly a unique gift to discover more about life and the What IF's for a better understanding... The other nice thing about the 5th (of each month) is that everyone whose 5 can celebrate along with anyone whose age ends in a '"5", including the tens if you want or wait until the 10th of the month (or yes, Do Both!) Now we're picking up steam in dreaming up possibilities. I was envisioning inviting my 8th grade class to go to NYC again like we did on our three day extravaganza-wanza field trip in 1977 when most of us were young 14 year olds (or about to be by the end of that double 7 year...

James Bond likely had an ultra big win in the media that year, I'll have to google it since he was Agent 007.) Now back to the idea of Reunions..I basically love the idea yet the dates and ways to connect with people used to be a bit tricky...Now with the ol' internet it's almost too easy and we take it for granted. It's helpful to have a page for one's high school, even class and college.

. But more on that another time. For now I will be looking to reconnect with some important warriors for America, and sadly it comes on the heels of too many tragedies of people being harmed by Those they know and are supposed to be cared for or otherwise respected by. That would include the Sheffield MA Mom and Her Three Kids having a formal service.

The biological father of Alex, Zoe and Marek and legal husband of the Mom Justine took his own life after ending theirs in mid March of 2019 in their home before the school day began. That tragedy shook the small communities and echoed in ever larger circles.

I have written to our local papers in the MA/NY CT area and have commended the Berkshire DA for setting up a Task Force with many agencies and advocates working together. I feel education has to be a big role in the outreach. Unfortunately for reasons not clear to some, the funding for many school-based programs that could enhance those efforts has been cut. Perhaps they will be replaced with other programs with funds coming from another source, publicly or privately.

We do have the Berkshire Taconic Foundation and in Torrington CT the Community Foundation to encourage non-profits to fill the gaps. I have been delayed a couple hours in getting to some special programs at Crystal Essence such as the authors of This Moment Is Your Miracle presenting in person.

This weekend there will be advocates at the BMCC in Albany NY, that's the Battered Mothers Custody Conference. It can run a few hundred dollars to stay at the hotel, get there and back, have some simple meals and afford the basic fees (some reduced fees for mothers in need for instance can be helpful.) People come from literally each part of the country, even Hawaii and do REMARKABLE ADVOCACY and tell their stories as it may be safe to do so. These are the unsung heroes for those without a voice, due to many miserable reasons such as being fearful, on the run, injured, silenced legally or done in by their abuser or tragically even committing that desperate act of suicide if they haven't left the country or found another way to survive. Some may be imprisoned such as Elsa Newman was for years for trying to protect her children (and someone else trying to take matters into their own hands to investigate and through a turn of events the father who was likely abusing the children getting hurt by that someone but having Elsa held accountable...)  Some people know they are being mistreated, controlled, 'forced (without physical harm) to be a victim of assault or physically battered and sometimes sexually violated in an an array of ways...some with the motivation for the perpetrator's own satisfaction or sometimes with intention to harm the person, whether a stranger, acquaintence, relative, wife or child. It runs the gamut with some estimates of marital rape of some kind being less than 1 in 20, but more common than likely reported, especially for other forms of sexual assault. The laws are being addressed and updated to extend or remove the statute of limitations and basically as difficult a topic as that is, At Least We're Talking About It in Meaningful Ways. The stigma is being decreased with the #MeToo movement and overall, people are wanting to have more accountability for how others are being treated and ways to intervene reasonably to help victims and yes, hold perpetrators accountable, insist on calling things what they are, educating communities even if many violators do not seem interested or able to comprehend their wrongdoing. Lundy Bancroft and Barry Goldstein as well as CA Protective Parents Alliance and Duluth Model all offer important insights as do works on the Civic Research Institute.org site. Hopefully every state could have a volunteer group of people doing advocacy so there would be fewer limitations on what can be said to educate the public and provide meaningful help to those in need online if not in more personal outreaches. Thanks for doing your part to get smart early in life and keep updated about the plight of each age group, gender, race and species (pets and animals locally and worldwide.) The earth's needs are pressing as well and we collectively can share our concerns and skills to 'turn our ship around' and not become a Titanic story for the aliens to have to tell their progeny without us there to clarify some details. Peace and light to all to feel, heal and deal with what's real 'together!"

Good thing the key to my car was misplaced so I could share this post with you...and even better knowing I have an extra I can get once a ride comes by (or it gets delivered per a couple phone requests...) This UD, Unexpected Delay, comes after taking quite a while to pack, review what I needed and what I might need, clean said car and make sure it was up to snuff with a mechanic doing a quick check, getting gas in the car and planning to leave a day early so I'd be sure to be there on time (which I realize is not a Requirement so likely I need to review that sense of urgency.)

With a few weeks of planning in advance with a few others, we realized we had Two hotel rooms booked for the next couple of days rather than only one. Thankfully a half hour before Needing to cancel one or pay extra, we happened to review our emails (which helps if one has their Computer and/or Phone with them At All Times,whereas mine were both at another location since the phone needed charging. That's even though I Thought I had an extra charger (and do but wasn't sure where I had put it.)

So again, since I only had a couple of days in this location to get ready for the trip, I was needing extra time...and with the other commitments I had, I kept hurrying myself along only to stop and chat on the phone with someone...mindful of the time, more or less. My advice for anyone interested whose travelling is Give Yourself Two Days Time to get to where You're going.

That way even if a plane is delayed due to weather or has to turn around (that happened to someone whose plane had to turn around due to door that wasn't shut tight...hmmm) you can still get to where you need to go (especially if heading out of the country...Get to That airport from wherever else you may be in the country A Day or Better yet Two Early. That sounds like Another post, so for now, I'll bow out. The options I have at this point are to go get my key and leave tonight or spend the night here and travel during the daylight and arrive before or near the 10 am start time..

.Just saying, I and all of us generally speaking Have Options. Not to depress people even more, but I happened to read about a precious young boy, AJ, named for his 60 year old biological father, in Indiana who was abused chronically after being returned from his first two years in foster care since there were opiates in his young body upon a DCF check. His name was Andrew and both of his biological parents, including his pregnant mother who was also the mother of a 3 year old in the home and was in her mid 30s, were found to be on drugs.

As horrible as that is, it's a bit helpful to think they were not 'rational' when they were doing horrible things to their children, including have a house that wreaked of feces and was in 'deplorable conditions.' People can live in lovely homes and have abusive or conflicted relationships with twists and turns. Ideally 'messes' could be contained to plastic tubs or boxes, and pets cared for decently along with the children please. We could have numerous outreaches to help parents provide basics for kids from food and clothes.

That can be challenging especially over time and if someone has not had much experience caring for others and children in particular. There could be free education and mentoring programs, without a huge threat to 'lose one's kids' if everything isn't perfect. But there needs to be accountability and these folks seem 'way past any concerning limit.' DCF had been called 17 times and some say the system has too many loop holes and not enough teeth. The also said the father was adept at knowing the law and how to get around things. Overall, more information should be shared to enlighten us and help provide justice for these young heroes and all children and victims of abuse. We need and want to do better.