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Healing Square Breathing in Lieu of a Heavenly Birthday Cake...Breathe in Life

on Mon, 10/01/2018 - 13:42

Monday, October 1st...has a nice ring to it (and I've blogged about this month as a way to start new community and home care efforts, some inspired by Karen Kisslinger, and many great parts of my life such as being in a big family, having a regular faith group and friends to share life with in meaningful ways. I have also gained inspiration from Steiner schools, ,small town schools and networking and larger towns and cities too.

Today would have been my friend Karen Kisslinger's birthday. She'd often have a wonderful potluck at their home on Silver Mtn in Millerton which has great views and her nice gardens. There's a website in her name, www.karenkisslinger.com that raises funds to support people in healing modalities...

So eat an apple (organic or peeled, and chew s-l-o-w-l-y and thoroughly are tips I learned from Karen, not easy to follow but worth knowing... Also at 11am and 11pm (or another Am and Pm time tha works) take "Time to Relax" (A CD she made that a fellow recorded and helped him learn the basics to breathe in for four counts, hold for four and let go for four then rest for four.It's called Square Breathing and I use my fingers to keep track of the 4-count, tapping the pointer to the thumb then the next  3 in turn for each breathe or pause. Doing 4 rounds of that can be centering... 'try it, you'll like it' as Mom would say about many a tasty dish, Lebanese or otherwise..

The big news I learned about for our country the other night is that House Resolution 72 passed in the US Congress, and will go to the Senate soon. That would prioritize Children's SAFETY in custody matters rather than leave it up to a legal battle about who should care for children if there is domestic abuse, generally against the mother.

Learning about who is the Primary Aggressor (and having laws such as CT recently enacted and hopefully will use effectively) is also important, because and abuser will often define the victim as causing them to hurt the victim or otherwise to blame. Some are truly confused but finally our courts do not need to contribute to the Ongoing Crime of Abuse once the matter is identified in court. For attorneys and legal and social service or mental health people to do so is actually a form of malpractice, becoming complicit with a crime that was not only committed but often escalates in court or other serious financial or legal arenas.

I learned these kinds of things through Civic Research Institute.org books on DV and Custody and Representing the DV Survivor. In addition many speakers at the BMCC, Battered Mothers Custody Conference held annually for national concerns, would shine a light on the shadow side of many relationships that often harm victims and result in harm as well for abusers. Generally that's men hurting or killing women (in rare cases, but about 500-1000 moms and 60 kids done in each year, so far more than chance.)

This House Res 72 would set the tone for providing better protection for victims of abuse, and it's coming at a time when the nation is ripe to learn about the patterns of control, domination and violation whether due to Brett Kavanaugh's denial and lack of consistency, the #MeToo movement, Women's Marches, ongoing disclosures of crimes of the past that too many community and other leaders Knew About and Did Nothing about and so much more.

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