Don't overlook value of National Conference for DV Custody Issues in Albany NY in May 2016, see www.barrygoldstein.net
The Battered Mothers Custody Conference is an important national conference for serious advocates or victims in need of information to find support particularly during custody battles...seewww.civicresearchinstitute.org for two books Barry Goldstein worked on with many others...one about Representing the DV Survivor..get ready to have your Eyes Opened Fully to not only tragic patterns in the courts and society but thankfully some wisdom on how to repair the travesty for coming waves of women in need and their precious children. For men who are in a similar position that is also a struggle but ideally a woman would agree to have people monitor and report back to the dad and even allow visitation under the proper settings.
The reality is the lion's share of harm is done to women and kids by men...so taking that into serious consideration, those men who do feel they are truly the victims could perhaps seek ways to highlight the bigger problem which they may have bumped into for reasons beyond their immediate karam would dictate (same for women, maybe in terms of many lifetimes as a person or family system these kinds of things play out to balance our understanding of the human condition.
IF we can learn to meditate and see sites such as Edgar Cayce, www.are.com or org..we may entertain the notion that we live many lifetimes and learn lessons for our soul, and that our children maybe chose to be part of our lives as spirits and we do the best we can...We can seek to do better and take the ethical challenges seriously much like advocates put drunk driving laws in place after MADD and facts showed there were major problems not being addressed.
Ralph Nader and others are promoting ideas for more groups to take the lead in seeing services and programs created to meet immediate and local needs, realizing when people have a vested interest in a better kind of society, they are more apt to join forces and once leadership emerges likely 80% of people are willing to endorse it and find ways to implement improvements. Sadly confusion often reigns during times of crisis in family matters and people must use existing courts and so on to work things through. That is where it is key to PLAN with better Options and Interventions when thinking about living with people, caring for others and being community minded..Thanks for doing what you have and continue to do in terms of caring for your be you to full self and others..
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See @BMCCxii for tweets about many ideas and folks.
Forget the Emmy's, the Real Heroes that movies are made about were at the BMCCxii, this year the twelfth Battered Mothers Custody Conference comprised of mothers who lost their children in full or part to systemic legal abuse And controlling fathers of their children (not only The Dads.
.but yes, it all mostly starts with a narcissistic, unbalanced personality of a guy who acts WAY out of balance..and yes, some women can do that number too as Patricia Mitchell shares candidly about the horrors of her mom and sister attacking her (the former doing so physically when she was about to bear her first and only child, a lovely girl who she did not get to protect much or see even though she was a high society NYC gal who was well-educated and a top model in the 1980s.
Clearly it was not all glamour and glitz and even her amazing connections couldn't help Her save her child from being taken from her and given to a drug using Dad living in squalor in a trailer park. Patricia went on to become a Huge Children's Advocate, again the stuff of Erin Brokovich type movies...so really one needs to be done of her along with the scandals she has exposed.
There were almost shows done of her on 48 Hours and maybe she has been or will be on Dr. Phil. But the threats rise with exposure, so for now she is planning on speaking to state representatives on a larger scale. She is our Dorothy whose gotten the broomstick of the wicked witch or really warlocks of the West, and She is FIGHTING FOR ALL OF OUR CHILDREN AND DECENT MOMS (and Dads as the case may be, but please don't fall for the typcial sociopathic cool facade many competent men can use to cover a double personality!) Realize 'functional alcoholics or drug addicts are often able to perform ADLs (activities of daily living such as getting up and to work, even fly airplanes or operate on people..so maybe new mandates for drug screening needs to be part of every profession...sorry to sound like a party pooper but often from DUIs to others under the control of out-of-control abusive or unstable people pay the piper. The caring thing to do is help Those Folks Get HELP, and not let them continuously harm people for years, including their family members...kind of makes sense, doesn't it, almost like an evolution revolution. The trouble is those able to intervene are not often monitored (maybe taped proeceedings like police wearing cameras but now social workers for DCF and other decision makers should be recorded and monitored by an HONEST, Accountable group rather than so much 'back room dealing' landing kids in foster care and adoption centers..
We can find ways to support her and all who do this work. All good minds and time contributions (and even money to fund the next conference if not give support to another who is starting her life over after more than a decade or struggle and being apart from her children for literally not even knowing what was behind some of the difficulty she suffered when learning her two boys were being molested by their Dad and someone else tried to intervene.
She was put in prison for being part of a conspiracy when she had no knowledge of the plan or episode someone pursued to catch him red-handed..and he was in bed with one of his kids who had no shirt on. Okay, just the jist of what was transpiring not only in the 80s and early 2000s but happens today.
The adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) are a risk factor for self-harm, drug use, and a malady of illness and harm for a person over their lifetime, according to The Saunders Study. See more on www.barrygoldstein.net Another advocate has helped him promote his The Quincy Solution book which could save the country $5Billion Dollars in direct and indirect costs of abuse. The www.voicesofmen.com outreach with Don't Blame the Victim and Believer (of Victims) bumper stickers are ones worth wearing on one's tee shirt, front or back. My lil' Green Suburu with lots of stickers for peace.) More to come...
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