Thanks to Jay Shetty whose got a great set of 222 Episodes of Insights for All on jayshetty.me
In the last few days I have been fortunate to tune into some amazing youtube talks and some practical coaching tips. One new favorite with short videos acted out then added insights are from jayshetty.me Hope you can catch a few and let the care sink in. He was a former monk I just learned.
That makes more sense since he seems sincere in his advocacy (and Maybe he is making money doing that but I think that's okay too...as long as the message stands to basic tests of good sense and integrity (and compassion.)
Please realize much of what anyone does or thinks may come from their first few years on this earth (so reflects the people caring for them or otherwise influencing them...)
Please realize much of what anyone does or thinks may come from their first few years on this earth (so reflects the people caring for them or otherwise influencing them...)
Then there is the media and culture of the day. We can accept likely that we are 'a conglomeration of inputs' and we should all get a prize for figuring out a game plan for a day let alone a longer span of time..and indeed, 'a life time'.
We can be sure we don't really know exactly what happened to us in the past..so looking at anything as a lens toward responding to some of those shadowy inputs can be helpful if we do it with care and curiousity about having such an experience (or yearning or feeling pressure to do or be someone short-term or longer.
Even wanting a child or needing to be in a committed lifelong relationship may need some review to refresh one's reasons 'why one is feeling that way." Ideally sorting things out with a counselor or two, supportive friends and so on who can help one gain clarify and see if that seems to make sense with the rest of one's life (and is in sync with others involved) would make sense. Likely two sets of such support groups (for instance one for each person in a relationship or parenting relationship even if not living together initially or overtime or even if they are...) can be a help to explore what each person's experiences and expectations are.
Here's an important tip: No one teaches you this kind of reasonable foundational planning in school or even in faith circles or work places necessarily. You won't even see it on talk shows or mainstream media..yet you are touted to be an individual and almost pressured Not to Count on Support or good counsel..Hmmm , does that seem to made sense?
No, not exactly..and who wants to live their lives as a 'hit or miss' kind of baseball game without any coaching or team support? I didn't think so...Most things in life are worth being able to talk over with friends..and if not, it may be the kind of thing or secret you shouldn't be doing or keeping...
Now back to the comment on the post about "If You are Feeling Pressured" by Jay Shetty. Keep in mind the gifts each season of the year and life brings. Some say it makes sense to 'live your life backwards' in terms of reaching next goals which will take you along a path you envision best you can far into the future if not days of retirement. Many people live within a few hours of where they are born, so keep that in mind.
Others are travelling more and more. If one's work or school requires digiital access, be sure you have computer support including internet capability. Just thought I'd throw that in there (even if you are over 50 or are looking to retire. Internet is something that could help many older people feel they are young again and keep in touch with people and places that are important to them. Being an empathetic doctor or engineer may offer good feedback loops with clients and help you do a better job. Lots more to say here such as check out the philosophy of Brown University and colleges in general who are wanting to be more practical and current with their resources to benefit the world and help save it while there's time to do so!
Not only is learning important, it's big business and required by law to make the most of opportunities for students (or at least meet basic standards.) With many people wanting youth and students of all ages to succeed there are likely critical ways we could improve our learning communities (yes, expanded concepts of Sharing Alternative Learning Teams..especially in low populations where there could be many helping every class and subject be more comprehensible to all required to learn and others who are interested.
There are not man parents who can do what schools may expect them to do in terms of 'showing up for their kids', so why not include a few others who could help all succeed. Many ideas explored on livfully.org (such as helping parents from their earliest days of Thinking of having a child or learning they are expecting...and help with getting off chemicals and not smoke, eat right and lots more...)
Then not pressuring kids to learn too early academically yet enrich their real life learning experiences and allow for plenty of outdoor and free play time... music, storytelling and sharing an awareness of healthy food, gardens and other basics, even quiet time and good social connections and communication.
The Brooklyn Free School allows for students to 'call a meeting and work through a situation'. They learn to talk things over in a small group setting so hardly need adults figuring out every aspect of their lives..
.That said, my theme in a letter to the editor this week, the 10th year since our son Kaelan Palmer Paton lost his life while helping save others from below the Falls area of the Housatonic River in CT, we do all need to clarify basic laws, guidelines and expectations as states and communities for adults to supervise youth as well as for minors to be more responsible with their freedom and having privileges to be out on their own, drive and overall work with support to be more mature in their choices.
That pertains to adults as well, so hopefully this kind of 'do your best but keep things in perspective' will resonate with professionals and others so integrity and teamwork factor into everyone's best efforts... a good way to honor the legacy of those who have invested in us and who have journeyed on,leaving lessons for all in their wake.
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