Ooh, ooh babe..Things are gonna get much saner now...With a little help from your friends and This Post..."Now Hear This Please and Post on Fridge!"

Please print copies of this out, give to all family, friends and community members (maybe share on FB etc) and post on your fridge, after filling in a few of the blanks.You'll thank me and I hereby say, "You're welcome and Good Luck Remembering this when you need it, or role play and practice!" Get blank sheets of paper and include the following information with numbers if desired and give copies to 

those listed and keep one in one's purse or backpack,etc.

Students and others at school or in a workplace can let someone they trust (possibly a small group of people in charge

of keeping files etc) or even in residential units and towns, some of this 'personal information' but not with banking and passwords for phones or email etc included on this main list. 

Those could be put on another sheet or in a special notebook and given to one's Power of Attorney (POA) which someone should learn about how to be responsibly and see

if they are Willing and Able to get other help as needed, such as from elder law attorneys or have a second POA as a reliable competent back up and even other friends

to assist with basic matters.

Depending on the country and state, age and so forth, anyone may be able to have a financial guardian manage their finances at no charge (maybe 

that is through elder services etc.) Other programs may offer help for someone to get SNAP (food stamps), Energy Assistance (help paying for oil or electric or propane as well

as some help reducing the cost of paying for bills but one must inquire with the company etc.

Start with googling 'help with paying energy bills or getting food stamps etc." A program

called SimplifyCT.org can help with filing taxes through October 15th, 2021 for instance (see a post a few days ago on this Livfully.org blog.) In NY look at their CDPAP program

which pays family or friends to care for loved ones to help them remain in their home if they qualify with state medicaid. Their terms are changing as of July 1st, 2021 so it may 

be timely to speak with an Elder Law Attorney in NY if one is addressing that issue no matter which state they are in now since the terms for qualifying for medicaid are unique

in NY at this time...a best kept secret...

Now there is plenty more and I am not recommending anything specifically in terms of giving professional advice. This set of ideas is to get

people motivated to help themselves and each community think of 'planning ahead five or ten years' especially in one's 50s or older since many factors can come into play with 

one's health, wealth, social and legal status. If one person in a married or otherwise established couple becomes ill or wants to separate for any reason, assets and resource

may need to be divided (some equally and others not so much.)

People could benefit from knowing about mediation and other forms of ADR, Alternative Dispute Resolution. That is important for any two people beginning to make 

a connection, work or live together, share resources or caregiving for pets, people and their own children or relatives whether for pay or on a voluntary basis. If people do not 

charge initially for caregiving (even of their own parent or special needs relative or neighbor or friend etc) then it may preclude charging in the future. There is a lot to learn about

various situations that can evolve over time or come up suddenly. A team in each community could help educate people as much as possible in advance and hopefully be 

available with online or phone support if not personal help.

There could be teams to help with managing a home and considering arrangements over time with weekly zoom or phone 

meetings, keeping records and daily logs of hours of all doing caregiving or other tasks to understand matters and meet many requirements for accounting with the state

regarding employment, housing, meal coverage (which may be required for live ins to have for instance, along with some 'time off' to sleep or other time off periodically.)

Caregivers

could be directed to some online training programs or read summaries of what is required by home health aides and even CNAs, certified nursing assistants to be more 

familiar with the 'Do's and Don'ts' of assisting with medications (but not necessarily putting them in a patient's hand or mouth etc. or moving a patient safely especially if deemed

 a 'two person assist.' If that is the case that can also factor into the level of coverage for medicaid rather than medicare.

Knowing the ADLs (Activities of Daily Living) and 

charting how one is able to perform those (eating, transferring, dressing, bathing, toileting, preparing food, hygiene,getting to medical appointments etc) is all important to undertsand as criteria used by the medical

and financial systems to assess a person of any age. 

One's executive function (managing bills, appointments, making decisions) is also important to note. Some places factor in 

mental competency but others may not, yet more attention early on to a person's mental health

can be helpful to have support and interventions to prevent other problems such as

delusional thinking (and making false claims or calls to 911 or other professionals.)

Often a caregiver or others close to the person can be blamed by the client but also held  

responsible in the eyes of some professionals or the police.

Being clear about having support to manage these aspects of conflict and difficulty of caring for a person with 

mental health issues and finding the competent team of a Power of Attorney *usually a relative but not necessarily) is important. All receipts should be kept to be reimbursed or to

document valid pre-approved expenses (as much as possible.)

Ideally each town and family would have a fund and people to manage a transition for someone needing 'fill in or initial'

help after an accident, injury,, conflict or setback which the person could payback later so basically have covered through a 0 percent credit card or personal loan. Each 

person would be well to be advised to have some life insurance or a minimal funeral policy (some are designed to cover funeral costs in a timely manner and are a form of whole life

insurance, but there is also term life insurance to look into getting when young to cover debts even such as student loans which some colleges require to be paid back even

if a person dies.

There may be special insurance for that purpose.) Overall a group of people helping one another and others in their communities understand each age and stage 

 of life and 'what is required or recommended' to have support for financial, medical and social and legal help makes sense more than each person trying to learn and do all 

that is required on their own. There could be workshops and ways to cover a lot of material over the grade school and high school years so young people are more familiar with 

terms and can advocate for adults.

!. Your Name, DOB (Date of Birth), Address (and on another page for each family or household member.)

2. Name of a few people to call who know your whereabouts and personal medications, routines, doctors and so forth. Include special skills they can help with such as "call an attorney, be an advocate on the phone or in person, assist with a household, medical or financial need or police or legal matter such as contacting others on short notice or for important matters, going to court or helping one move items in or out of a home on short notice or even with a bit more time."

3. Name of all doctors, medications, pets and a list of routines in case someone needs care.

4. Ways to get transported for each household member, who they can ride with and any special needs (or anyone they should not ride with or interact with personally or alone etc.) People who can do shopping, who can provide care at their home or yours, who can care for a pet short term or longer, etc.

5. List all medications with dosages and place they are filled, the doctor's name and way the pills are stored and monitored. A caregiver can be held responsible or accused of wrongdoing if pills 'go missing' whether lost or given or sold to others. People with mental health challenges may accuse people of stealing their meds or other crimes without cause or evidence, so that is part of why the caregivers need to be informed and guided to have a 'fool proof' system such as counting out pills to be taken on a daily basis and storing the main supply out of the patient's reach etc. Having a way to count out pills regularly may be important still if there's any concern someone can access the meds. Ideally that would not be the case, but problems may arise.

6. If a friend or advocate is needed at one's home (if police show up for a wellness visit or other concern) then specific guidelines can be followed (and developed with the local and state police in each town and situation which should be written down and shown to the police when they arrive. 

Any video evidence or other writing about how a person in one's care should be assisted is

important to share with police to help them gain insight into a situation. A person should not resign 

automatically but could plan to have a few days off with fill-ins 'at the ready' initially with plans made as completely as possible to provide continuity of care.

7. A person moving out should not be watched closely by a member of 'the oppposite side.' That is particularly true to prevent a man from being close to a woman in any contentious situation. That would be especially important if the man had threatened or intimidated her in the past.

If police feel the person moving out should be monitored about what is being taken out of the home, the police could ask to see the contents of what is removed by having the person place it on an outdoor table (or even indoor one.) That may be legal or not, so needs clarification.

People who can serve all parties as assistants if not advocates could help everyone discuss everything. Hopefully there would be a message center in each town so information could be relayed without two particular people having to speak or cross paths. Agreeing to disagree and keeping matters 'focused on the patient, client, or youth etc' is important.

8. There could be a 'job description' for each person in the home.

If someone is caring for others, there would be specific instructions. A

legal caregiver agreement may be required to have clarified and signed Before

work is done in order for medicaid to take that into account as a legitimate bill and way to spend down funds etc. Everyone could consult a competent elder law attorney and do more research online. 

There can be many 'half-baked' promises and arrangements, so it pays to consider what a person needs in every stage of life and make it clear how needs will be met by a team of players. Each family member, friend or anyone providing care could record care and overall plans in a log book.

Gaining written informaation about what a person would like in various scenarios is important. That can take months and years.

It's important to be a team player if one is a POA, power of attorney. It also helps to take the cargivers notes and ideas to help a family or person into consideration.