Offering Condolences to Those Facing a Loss or Challenging Time with their pet or even people in their lives...

Have you heard of how hard it is to have a pet go missing? A community can put up alerts on Facebook and in small towns that can be a quick solution. People in the immediate area will go looking and others will keep an eye out. There are 'animal control officers' who can help facilitate other networks and basically everyone can be supportive and follow a situation along.

 

Usually in a few days to a week, a dog will be found or return on its own. What a sigh of relief and time of celebration for the owners and friends...and the wider circles on social media. But when the weeks turn into a month, then two, things become feeling a bit hopeless. Worry about someone taking the dog or cat can grow...and seem the case.

 

Then worse, what if the animal were hit by a car and injured and ran off into the woods where it wasn't found? These kinds of questions mount as though a Pandora's box of worry, blame, anger, fear and more keep tumbling out.

 

Unfortunately these same horrible feelings and worries come barreling out of one's mind and heart if a person, an elder or a child 'goes missing' even for a short period of a time..minutes or an hour can feel like a week, a complete life-changing experience...and not a good one in any respect..Just pure hell that one wants to Not Be In or Have Happen.

 

Thankfully even though thousands of people, particularly elderly and some children, do wander off due to their mental health or not knowing better or accidentally, most are found..and very quickly. A whole town will rally to search far and wide, scan an area and do repeated searches if need be to 'find a trace or clues.'

 

Overall we likely have a lot more to be thankful for in terms of most people feeling safe and being safe, well watched over and rather secure in their neighborhoods and outings, travels and routines to work, school, shopping and more.

 

Yet we are in a society where the "Bad News Is News" and the good stuff is glossed over sometimes because we're having too much fun to stop and notice or often in modern times, because we don't have much down time to 'think about gratitude' and ways our lives could be improved collectively (sharing and caring about ourselves, others and our areas are some of the best ways.)

 

That said, here are some thoughts I shared with a friend whose dog went missing for four months..and sadly has not turned up. There is a chance someone took her dog, whether locally or farther afield. There's a chance something happened to the dog particularly because there are rural areas and wild animals there that people in the suburbs or cities would not have to worry about.

 

Basically dogs are not allowed 'off leash' in those places, so a dog going missing may not happen as much. I am not sure of the exact situation involved with the dog's disappearance, but the social media and small towns pull together and help a lot. I am sharing this to offer condolences and support to any facing challenging situations...and not having a community or social network online to feel one is not alone or could get support over time without 'bothering others.'

 

We are all learning from one another. There are plenty of personal matters that 'can't be shared' too openly and are left for the movies and books to reveal through characters based on reality but with a change of names and locations to allow for some deeper digging into the meaning and dynamics and even the systems that could be impacted and even changed to improve our societal awareness.

 

Many people even in the fire department, ambulance and other primary care fields of medicine, counseling, nursing, elder and child care would do well to learn more about early warning signs of danger and abuse, control, intimidation and more.

 

Over time with steadfast education everyone could feel more 'empowered and educated' about situational and relationship as well as societal and legal awareness so that more effective early interventions and safe practices could be implemented across various fields and formats of communicating, interacting and caring about one another.

 

There's always 'another level' of learning and improving things to do so there are fewer 'accidents' and mishaps or lack or care happening 'in plain view'. Let's be willing to learn from one another and lean into the realities that our lives do intersect and we are expecting a kind of societal norm and law to inform 'next steps.'

 

Many first responders for instance could learn about 'domestic abuse' and best practices to keep victims safe, both adults (generally women) and children and pets.

 

See how connected these apparently disparate topics are... dogs going missing and domestic abuse for instance? The people in charge may not even agree on how to search for a 'missing person' such as what happened with the case when Tom Drew, 91, went missing from his Salisbury CT home on July 21, 2007.

 

That was about two years prior to our teen son Kaelan passing away one day when trying to help his friends in very difficult water get to safety. Maybe his efforts made a critical difference but that was 'almost impossible' to determine.

 

According to one psychic he went under when he pushed his friend to help him stay afloat, but the water was so rough any attempt likely really doubled the odds they both would go under (either do the waters or hanging on to one another or trying to help one another such as Kaelan did by going into the very turbulent water and with the undercurrent being very strong forces that held him for many days.

 

The precluded more extensive recovery efforts yet many others were in harm's way initially trying to retrieve Kaelan in the hours after he went under water.) This kind of discussion would be easier with 'anonymous' person's being named,so I may revise it. The point is Anyone Could Be In Danger or Die if they fall or jump into water they do not know is safe to swim in.

 

That is something we don't go over clearly enough and somehow get confused about due to 'commercials' and thinking one or more people has enough skill to relay or teach others, even if there is no clear plan or evidence the people are qualified and that there really is a Green Light to get going with an adventure or highly dangerous plan or activity like swimming in whitewater.

 

Thanks for considering these points as they come to mind. I have a busy day that I need to get going with, but wanted to take time to honor the overall situations on many fronts, from facing 'realities and doing some extra checking' about being with people or in places that need more supervision as added security measures and not pushing the limits of what is reasonable in terms of interactions.

 

Most states are clarifying some terms for child care, elder care, those with special needs or mental health challenges and much more. There are many more 'blanks to fill in' with informed best practices that prioritize safety 'each and every time' there are interactions among people.

 

Even simple things like 'handing a baby over to another person' should be thought through..and ideally would become more a case of a person sitting down with a baby and another person coming to pick the baby up out of the person's arms once they ask, "Are you ready for me to take the baby or child from your arms now?'

 

Like a person picking up a basketball from someone's hands, rather than having the ball passed to one, is how a child should be transferred from one person to the next.

 

Trying to take a few minutes to stand next to the person who is standing (or sitting) and asking if that person needs anything or letting them know you will be ready in a minute to take the baby, but make sure they hear you and can repeat back ,"Okay you will let me know in a few minutes when you are ready to take the baby" can avoid one person thinking the other caregiver is 'now ready' since they are near the child to take over.

 

I went over this with a friend who works in a clinic with many expectant mothers and fathers..and basically 'there was no teaching or protocol' for that kind of simple important transfer...so Let's Change that with some More Game Plans, shall we?

 

It's nice to practice with a pillow or a ball or doll so everyone can have some fun and even toss that about to realize you don't do that with a real baby...and that goes for no shaking a baby ever, especially not when the young person is crying or for any other reason or excuse. Always know it is okay and good to put a child down and walk away if in a safe place (just to turn away even) and count to ten or call a friend if one is upset. Generally things do not happen 'out of the blue' if an adult gets upset.

 

Daycare teachers and many caregivers can handle a lot of noise and kids falling down, crying and so on and nothing necessarily triggers a person to get angry in a way they would have to act out harshly in word or deed to a child. That goes for big people too. One can ideally walk away or get away from the person, even telling them to 'stay back and don't touch me', step back and put one's hands up to create a clear boundary. If a person violates that then there is a problem and back up is needed.

 

Maybe even a quick hustle or run out the door. Ideally one would take one's child or children if that occurred in a home with another adult, whether family, friend, partner or otherwise. Those are not easy situations but most people likely have had a time or two from their past, growing up or in relationships when they found they needed personal space sooner rather than later. Taking one's children or pets, or money or something important (license and personal papers) is easiest done by having that packed and in a safe place. Okay back to posting this pronto...Good Luck with the Day and with Life...It will get better sooner hopefully for many more people with such basic considerations and making a few friends locally and online, via phone and other kinds of networks.

 

That all means Planning Ahead, ideally a few minutes to five or more to make the transfer. That can be challenging when people are heading out in the morning to work or shop or do something in a timely way. Speaking of which, I do have a train to catch in a few, so if you are ready please, I will put this in park and let you pick up reading again when you have time. Best to you all... Here's the post about animal communication and tending to our feelings when there are transitions or big changes or losses, especially without a lot of answers.

 

The kind of immediate investigation procedures (voluntarily to treat scenes and people as part of a crime or trauma scene' to preserve evidence, get written statements (even with each person's lawyer present or have a way to document to defend one's actions with evidence such as a video recording and commentary about the day of the event, people one spoke to, phone calls one made and even for the day before what one can recollect about one's whereabouts and actions would makes sense. That is what a deposition may require many weeks or months later and that can be challenging to do accurately. That in turn can lead to confusion as can other witness accounts such as neighbors and family and friends relaying what a person told them.

 

Things that are video recorded even with an audio aspect only if need be (for phone calls) would allow people to assure someone of what they said and did moreso than competing accounts. The case of lie detector tests can be troubling since various factors can 'throw the results.' Okay now with that, I need to throw a few things together and make that train... Best to all again..and always, we can pull through over time as people are willing and able to allow for a deeper understanding of the bigger meaning in life..In the end my Mom and many believed..there will 'be no secrets' so live with integrity and try to pitch in with the vast amounts of work and care that is needed on many levels..even a willingness to listen and consider 'the truth' or other people's input as valid.

 

That can be very healing and helpful in terms of allowing one to 'make peace with the past and live more fully in the present, even if that means with a few more precautions and clear plans for communities, states, countries and our world. I think that's what most people are counting on and feeling is needed anyway due to political and environmental pressures...so maybe 'always have a personal bag packed to head out the door..and even one for kids and pets too' so you're Really Ready. Practice a few times just to get somewhere on time or early..and even make a habit of taking time to go over a written checklist before leaving (and before getting out of a car or bus that you have all your Kids, Pets, People and Bags (a certain number and your phone if you used it along the way, etc.) Okay, happy Travels and Living.