Journaling over five decades...especially lately. Good Medicine for CV-Laden Times.
In addition to eating, sleeping and being busy during the day,
at times in my life, I had to journal. That means, write stuff down.
Questions about what's happening in the world as well as what
was happening in my personal life. Now the two are not only similar,
the questions about what to do in the world and in my own life,
everyone seems to have the same ones circling in their minds
privately at home, on calls on the phone or online in emails and
the media. It feels like we are 'circling the drain', on a downward
spiral of losing our rights out of necessity and not being certain
'the old times will be back again and life will be back to normal.'
I explore many topics on Livfully.org and to letters to newspapers,
primarily the independent Lakeville Journal of CT. The guidelines I allow
myself since 7th grade at Kellogg School was to 'journal a few pages
daily in notebook.' The teacher would read that and comment and
helped me understand constructive criticism, where he was raising
a question about my work not me personally for instance.
I struggled through high school and college organizing my papers
and thought I'd have to drop out of classes or school at times since
keeping up with many classes and life demands just seemed
insurmountable, some worse than others.
I was having to look
at life in new ways, examine thoughts, feelings (that one came
through a lot of counseling more as a parent), beliefs (from
religious upbringing but also world views, psychology and philosophy studies),
and geography (what's the world got to do with how people live their lives.)
Just when I'd have the answers to life figured out, someone would
Change The Questions. That seemed hugely unfair, but also motivating,
to not assume I had things all figured out, especially for more than
myself. Everybody else was going through a pipeline of sorts, with
school and demands, jobs and people to care for and sure take a
little time off now and then, but most people I knew were workaday,
steady folks, happy to get time to go out for coffee or dinner now and then.
I used to think the sports industry was getting too big for anyone's good.
Why not have everyone get help being fit early in life and then enjoy
life without as much pain or weight gain through regular guidance and
support with exercise and eating well? Same with childcare, why not
have a lot of free help in every school district with free childcare and
parenting support, even help with housework and laundry as well as
meals. Wouldn't it make sense to combine energies and resources r
ather than have everyone expend much more energy getting the basics done?
I have seen how some communities organize themselves in groups of a
few hundred to live and work in their own village. That's the group that
makes Community Playthings and it'd be helpful to know how they are
doing. What's working and what extra measures or pressures they are facing
living collectively even with things likely going along much as they were before.
The need to conform at times or in life to social norms is something people
have experienced to some extend in most families, faith groups, social groups
and more. Ideally those are done 'voluntarily' and with respect for laws of
freedom yet there are many people who have grown up in 'cult-like' groups
and communities who have not had independence or ways to leave readily.
The impact of the Corona Virus is affecting everyone on many levels, without
much support to explore one's feelings, ask questions and get clear answers.
The dire prospect of people having little food or basic supplies (yes, even the
coveted toilet paper) are fleeting concerns yet likely could be taken more
seriously by every community. Distribution centers and people doing deliveries
have provided lifelines for food and PPE, personal protection equipment. Most
are hoping things will be back to normal before long, yet some New York Times
articles are explaining that without customers now, huge amounts of food are
being thrown out because it is too much to try to reconfigure for distribution.
It seems the government would be able to intervene and help make a way for
products, both fresh or at least milk, eggs and other foods not go to waste and
lead to shortages. Perhaps prices to consumers could be cut down and the
government offset other fees for the producers. At least the concerns are being
raised. Now it's time for more people to brave asking questions and exploring
their collective (and individual) responses. These are tough new times and
may not be 'changing back' anytime soon.
Thanks for al doing their part to 'Stay Safe and Stay Home' yet also to learn
what various thinkersare sharing to promote a healthy transition to more
interactions, at least onlne and with groups thinking things through for men,
women, children, pets and other animal care needs, people of each
age group, level of need and healthcare needs.
Getting one's ducks in a row sooner rather than laterfor back-up support
and considering what one would do if ill especially with Corona symptoms
could guide more public health outreach. Indicating what health forms
are available online or through various agencies (hosptials, nursing homes or
homecare agencies, etc as well as one's doctor) to discover what a health care
representative isand an Advance directive is and how to have support in
naming one and addressing issues is a growing field of interest and need.
More consistency in the 'medical profession at all levels would be important
to review especially with the increased demand and set of public health concerns.
I am learning about a new offers to help people access helpful resources.
Be in touch about any challenges along those lines or with questions I may be
able to share (anonymously)to help more people tune into these more personal
but also public concerns (that systems are well-informed
and integrated to follow one's directive and what may be asked of a
represenative in these CV Times, especially regarding the use of a ventilator.
The more questions we can raise, the more likely we can
hear helpful information and 'answers.'
Thanks for being part of the solution whenever problems may
arise, not be putting oneself in danger or practicing in a field one is not
qualifed in etc, but by sharing questions and information reasonably
(not as directives but more from experiences or as What IF
scenarios and playing out various options...)
I'll give more examples soon but for starter, what if someone did
want antibiotics during end of life care when about to die, but a medical
person withheld them for something like a urinary tract infection (a UTI) without
checking with the elderly patient or their representative?
Could there be reason to have a system for 2-3 people review a patient's directive
when there could be doubt or confusion about what was intended given routine
health problems even if someone is elderly, disabled or otherwise not in the
fullness of their life or at the top of their physical game but not at the point of
wanting to 'check out?'
Why wouldn't there be clear guidelines about having timely review of what a paper
is saying along with a recording made by the patients conveying their wishes
Iideally with a consistent checklist that includes medical terms to avoid confusion.)
The decisions doctors or others in charge or consulted could be recorded not only
on paper but conveyed and signed off on by the health care representative.
Sometimes that may mean having the representative stay close to the person or having
an alternate ready to step in since some medical conditions or even a discharge from
one facility such as a hospital to a nursing home may require an updated 'life support'
or 'without life support' order to be signed.
If the patient's mental capacity becomes temporarily but subtantially diminished
it is importantfor the representative to be able to make the best call according to
What the patient's expressed wishes were.
Sometimes someone may want CPR but not to be shocked back to life,
but that may not be in keeping with a medical facility's guidelines. It may be
an 'all or nothing' policy and again those things need to be well understood by
the community in general 'well in advance' of needing to think things trhough during a
crisis or before a transport for instance
Ideally each person would have guidance and supoort from their physicians and people
they feel are qualified to help the person think things through on many levels and
working with that physician. There may be a gap in outreach, training and personnel, even
though doctors can bill medicare for some consultations along these lines.
See a site DoingDeathDifferently.com to learn more about such options and
people who may be learning to assist people with matters in a supportive role
regarding illness, aging or end of life issues., called End of Life Doulas (EOLD)
or Certified End of Life Specialists (CEOLS.) There are also online programs
for community members to take, some for free from Doulagivers.org and other places.
Always due some background checking and make sure people are legitimate,
especially if sharing any personal information or being asked to pay for a service.
Talk with others and do diligent research.
Do not feel pressured to buy things 'under a time limit' or as a one-time offer,
although some of those '''deals' may be of interest, check with competent other people
so you are not caught up in marketing ploys. Some come with a 30-day money back guarantee,
but be certain you understand any terms to prove you gave it a try.
There may be a time and action set of steps (documenting things were done online for instance)
required. Possibly you can get a chance for taking a program at a later date if offered again,
but again, talk things over without pressure of bonuses and offers. Likely the offer will come
up again, sometimes better!
Sometimes working through things about Why one wants to take more programs or trips, spend
money and so on are linked to previous times when one felt deprived not only of things but of
reasonable nurturing and attention whether from a parent, a partner, teacher, friend or oneself.
Finding support (again online or in books) to look at root causes for patterns or even episodic
emotional ups and downs or patterns of behavior that are puzzling can enrich one's journey...
and 'de-activate some of the triggers to get more or help one feel one is 'enough' and worthy
of good feelings and a better life.
Keep track of what you do sign up for in a notebook then map out when you
will take the program so it doesn't get put off and forgotten about. Then check you calendar daily
or have someone else do so and remind you. These are tips I have developed over years and still '
need. Plenty of 'uh-oh moments' but I'll put those in another post!
