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On the eve (11:11pm) of our teen son's passing 9 years later...

on Sat, 06/16/2018 - 03:24

While eager to head to bed for some rest after a head cold that seems to have been part of about five other people's experience in my circle, I took time to look on Facebook on the Northest Corner Chatter in CT. The mention of a Free First Aid for Mental Health elicited this response from me. I will add more soon, but will share my two cents..and again pay tribute to the care and courage our teen sno Kaelan Alexander Palmer Paton (who I write about so if one googles his name one can find other posts.) If you want to honor his sacrifice and love for others, take time to give yourself a big hug and allow your BeYouToFull self to shine through and take an hour to walk outdoors, maybe play a simple game of catch, rest on the grass or help someone with some light chores.

All 'easy does it' and with appropriate connections and ideally adult supervision where that would make sense (and with parental permission from both parents if a minor, under 18.) Lots more on safety tips would say 'guys help guys and gals help gals" and in general get to know people in groups and have a plan to be in public places to socialize, safe wayt to travel to approved places (by society's standards and local rescue people recommendations for instance, not just wild and woolly places cool as they may seem.) 

Remembering many loved ones who are on the other side for each of us..and the seven generations or 128 beings who may have been connected with our current journey (such as Jarrad Hewatt shared in one of his talks recently.)

I have enjoyed the information and programs offered on Jennifer McLean online also (who had a special on tonight..but so far I have not felt I will do that one, but appreciate her free calls on the 18th of the month in 2018. I will list more of the people I have appreciated hearing about or meeting, but for now trust much is on this blog so those who may benefit from hearing about them will find them. Here's my post and to all a nice mid June and onto a solstice and summer. Here's to holisitc, caring love, health and happiness.

NAMI MA is a helpful resource (with a warm line to call.) CT doesn't have that feature but has some NAMI resources for communities to access. Two trained facilitators are needed to go through their comprehensive support material. There was a 12 week program offered about a decade ago (maybe even more). I took the teacher training and a group facilitator program (including a workshop with the NAMI founder and former director, Joyce Burland who flew in from Ohio for the afternoon.) What an honor but she was all about getting through the key points.
 
NAMI Walks were held in Hartford for a few years. I went in May 2009 which as many can appreciate was the month prior to our teen son Kaelan Palmer Paton's passing at the Falls which were at a fast level. Many local people do not understand the power of the river and the importance of having a safety plan including not going with a hundred feet of the edge of the river (just to start with something reasonable.) There are many parallels to preventing any conflict, crisis or downward spiral whether regarding supervising others of any age including those with special needs and (especially minors who one is legally liable for as parents, or others temporarily on duty and even as community members.)
 
More outreach for handling a challenge would still be appropriate to pursue even on the 9th year of Kaelan's passing amidst helping friends and having an extensive response from local rescuers. There is much to discuss and hopefully a few brave folks from each town and even neighboring state would want to make meaningful suggestions, much as I have offered in various posts on www.livfully.org Thanks to all who are putting their best efforts toward caring for themselves and others with an eye toward the greater good.
 
Kaelan's service in on youtube in short segments and there is a Facebook page in his memory as well. Having enjoyed many aspects of our small towns as a youth, family member and friend to many, Kaelan and our other wonderful children,now grown, appreciated everyone who helped keep the schools, programs, faith groups and businesses going locally and beyond. While it used to be a challenge in ways to realize he couldn't enjoy things as he did when alive, I have met many people who have helped me consider he's on another level of his spiritual journey...and may be offering guidance and a helping hand more than I can fathom.
 
That goes for many loved ones we all have known over our lives. There's likely lots more to consider than our basic busy world allows us to consider, yet many smaller networks and media programs are helping us 'think outside of the box...and even outside of the coffin.' I have now studied End of Life Doula work (with Suzanne O'Brien online) and met others doing that work around the country on a Facebook page.
 
Recently a council was formed and is working in concert with hospice to offer more support to people at challenging times of terminal illness or decline. There is also more outreach about elder care and helping people make reasonable transitions when more help is needed. Comparing program offerings for homecare in CT vs MA and NY as well as other places such as NJ likely would make sense for many facing those matters. TRIAD is serving the area in important ways with timely public talks for elders and others.

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