Civic Research Institute shares Domestic Violence Report articles and newsletters

"Mothers Risk Loss of Custody in Cases Involving Parental Alienation and Abuse Allegations" by Attorney Joan Meier and others important for all states to clarify these pressing matters and make appropriate changes to safeguard people, particularly abused mothers and children so they can have their human rights of safety, connection and decent living conditions respected.

https://www.civicresearchinstitute.com/online/article_abstract.php?pid=18&iid=1433&aid=9325

There is a great deal of advocacy for 'shared parenting' and yet  should not be sought (even by parting parents who think it might be helpful, maybe to resolve conflicts and sort things out even if they still care about each other or even if they have simply 'grown apart' and want to move on.')

All people should be willing and able to have some free or otherwise consults by skilled domestic abuse advocates (though sites such as Duluth Model.org may shed a lot of light on these things for many people and could be recommended for all people to learn about to be safety advocates.) Particularly women and children, should be screened  early and often in a relationship and any kind of living apart or custody process about abuse which they may not recognize or label as such (since many things can happen over a long period of time and set standards of worry, fear, compliance, denial, neglect and more.

These are tough topics and many states propose more strict serious responses to abuse, but those may fall short since there are other ways legal arguments and such can get around 'family issues' or even criminal charges. Ideally more men would become aware of any benefit they are receiving from the silence around domestic violence. Everyone could 'stop blaming the victim' whether for not leaving or caring for her own children 'enough' or 'for once and for all.'

The boundaries for each parent need to be spelled out and more coaching given to anyone thinking of having a child or being in a relationship about the legal and practical financial, housing, childcare or self-care that would be required to 'get by' or have a certain kind of life in whichever society, country, state or area one is residing in. Knowing the legal and social service and even medical systems earlier rather than later is very important, yet often 'left to the wayside.'

More religious and cultural supports should clarify what their obligations and suggestions would be for other support or internal help whether financial, legal, logistical or online sites would be. 

Keeping records of contacts and reports of concern, any violence or deprivation of funds, food, rides and so forth is important for the victim to track in a safe manner. Too often social service and other agencies may 'blame the victim' and not see the dynamics of control and abuse for what they are. It may not be safe for the woman or mother to leave, she may have little means to support herself and her children, few or no housing options and a 'legal battle guaranteed' if she tries to get custody. These are scenes that typically play out in television dramas and movies, yet many people have lived them for years or are doing so today.

It is a huge waste of human talent and connection, often with social networks working against a victim and her children rather tha for them. That is why more public education and interest is imperative in 2020, and especially with the modern challenges of COVID19 which largely exacerbates the problems, injuries and even fatalies. Let's not sit in the dark any longer about these contentions public health and human rights issue. 

If there were a vaccine to prevent abuse, I'm sure every fellow would line up to get it...particularly the ones who don't need it but would do so 'just in case.' Let's get talking about things that matter...what do we have to lose and now we have the time maybe we've been waiting for to get around to things that matter to sort this hard stuff out whether in homes, faith groups, schools, colleges, military, work place or other social arenas. See Safe & Together Institute to get some key insights and sites such as CA Protective Parents Association for starters.